Chapter One An Introduction to Foxtura

why hello there, my name is Ace Foxtura, i'm a food detective, i spend most of my days cracking cases, returning lost Jaffa Cakes to the innocent, hmm sitting by the pool this morning is quite pleasing

oh and by the way, the guy behind me is my partner in crime, he's the Corneal, Corneal Confetti, he can be a bit of a bossy old coot, but he just wants to get the investigation done and sorted, and before i screw anything up, well lets see what he has to say.

hey Corneal, what's up?

planes, and birds that's what's up Ace, but what's important is that..*sigh* i don't know how i can tell you this Ace but, What Corneal? i cried, i have tackled more challenging tasks, whatever this time could be possibly worse? *sigh* i was going to say it to you gently but, there has been a shortage of Cheerios here in Buttonvile

 you can't be serious, holy cream crackers Corneal, we gotta do something, what info do you have? urgh not much i'm afraid Ace but i have been told that our investigation starts in China, god knows why though

China? but that's hours away

 pull yourself together Ace, do you have any idea how many cheerios are left? i took a deep breath and ask how many, then Corneal shouted and raised his fist, THIS MANY ACE! THIS MANY! now are you gonna wake up and smell the coffee? cause we got to catch the next plane as soon as we can.

and so we catched the 3rd plane to China, 3rd Ace why? well glad you asked i saw a lovely roast chicken at the airport cafe which i simply had to try! god knows where Corneal was, i think he was trying to find me, but anyway we made it safe there.

ah Corneal isn't it wonderful? Japan is such a beautiful country

damn the air is so fine, my mustashe, has tied itself together, fascinating! *a-hem* Ace i have said it once and i  will say it again, we are in China, its two totally different places.

shut your mouth! i am getting something, something fruity, hmm, my nose is telling me to go somewhere, Corneal! i think i know where to find what we are looking for! quick follow me! *sigh* wait Ace, i can't go on dressed like this, it is pretty hot day today, i'll meet you out front

as i was waiting for Corneal to get changed, i saw two friendly pigeons, erm well i think they where getting a bit to friendly i wont go into detail,  honestly i have waited for buses, but Corneal was taking ages, a few minutes later he came from out of the shadows.

now then Corneal took your time didn't you? i was honestly thinking of calling the search team for you i thought i was going to be a solo act, then he turned to me like i just stole £20 from his pocket, he replied

Ace, shut up, what do you think? when he said that i paused, grinned and said, Corneal, you look lovely, i bet the women of the land would be running for you

  he looked at me and smiled. after Corneal's fashion parade we went to our first location, i must admit it looked very interesting

so we made our way in, and by jingle, some sort of king must of lived here, looks like a great place to watch a slinky go down the stairs, Hey Corneal! can i.....

No Ace, no slinky, look we don't have much time here, three days is all we have, now come this door is very heavy. Heavy, you say as i questioned the Corneal and made a run head first into the door,

*kah-bang* and the door opened, heh you see Corneal you said i should use my head more often and so i am, wow thinking really hurts.

as soon as i got my head together i took a look around the mysterious room, i got to admit the first thing that came into mind was that i thought it was the tardis, i mean look at it, it is a lot more bigger on the inside than it is on the outside, its crazy. as i was looking around i caught my eye on something strange, something square i knew i had to go and "investigate" the Corneal wasn't too sure about it

Hazzah! looks like it was a key to a whole new enterence, Corneal look at me, it wasn't a normal well done you idiot, it was more like, i knew you can be a clever buggar sometimes but this time you have done me proud. then he shouted my name, Ace! come on, there stairs need a good walking down on, there must be something down there that could answer our mystery, and so i followed him, but being full of beans i ran down the stairs, but i got easily disappointed cause it was just one room, with a locked door, we didn't have a key or anything, then something came to mind, but just at that second Corneal butted in and said, Ace, i am not calling you stupid or anything but i can not see you opening the door with your mind

  Shush! shut yo mouth, i am thinking, thinking hard, really hard, just after Corneal sighed and said, well.. i can see this is going to take ages, since the shops are still open do you want me to go and get something for dinner or are you just gonna think it? "I didn't pay any attention to him, but i have learned something back on the police force in Buttonville, Bella always seems to let things go over her head, i thought that was a helpful skill, she just chuckled and said it was just her and her blondness and....
*snap*
Corneal Corneal! get your arse back down here look!! i did it! i really did it. and all i heard from him was a huge gasp he kinda looked terrified. and so i ran in laughing and shouting, See you later shit lord! Foxtura Away!!!

ah not so fast Ace, you may be disappointed again. "you got to be kidding me Corneal another locked door, whoever made this is very protective of their stuff, wait hang on what the devil is this?
"ah, well then Ace it looks like you have spotted another clue, hmm we need something heavy, hey you can sit on it i replied with a cheeky look in my eye. oh very funny Ace very funny, look there are some coins over there why not go and play with them while i'll pull this thing across, Coins? as i turned and looked at them a huge grin came on my face, i went to pick them up, and i said to myself, hmm, looks like these are mine *whistles* 

oh Ace, another room, well i think i might leave this one to you, "well ok, if you say so and erm, may i ask why is there a random yellow arrow coming out of it? don't you think that is a little bit odd. an arrow you say Foxtura? i think you may be still suffering from using your head today, i don't think your system is used to it.

right...so next your telling me that this foot button that just appeared is a figment of my imagination.

"not exactly, we are in a strange place anything can happen, now come on i can hear something

 erm Ace, i think we are in a bit of trouble....

find out what happens in the next chapter of....
             Ace Foxtura Food Detective